Les trois derniers mois ont été particuliers, nous avons entendu la phrase » Prenez soin de vous » très régulièrement. Elle terminait les conversations et agissait comme un talisman en ces temps incertains. Mais comment prendre soin de soi ? Les anglophones utilisent le terme self-care, qui est le fait de prendre du temps pour assurer son bien-être physique et mental. Ce n’est donc pas une action ponctuelle mais bien quelque chose qui s’intégre à notre hygiène de vie. Je constate sur les réseaux sociaux et dans la vie réelle plusieurs idées reçues et erreurs d’interprétation de cette notion qui vont de la surcompensation des besoins à la multiplication des moments « plaisir ». Il est évidemment essentiel d’avoir des moments de ce type, mais ils ne constituent pas des solutions durables et ne répondent pas au besoin de prendre soin de soi. C’était ma croyance quelques années en arrière, quand je cumulais stress et fatigue tout en utilisant des pansements temporaires : prendre une journée de congé ou aller déjeuner au restaurant, se réserver un moment détente pendant lequel je pensais sans cesse à l’après. On pense souvent que prendre de longues vacances ou éviter nos difficultés sont des ressources pour prendre soin de soi, or le self-care est avant tout une façon d’être : manger sainement, arrêter d’accumuler des possessions ou choisir la detox digitale, j’ai abordé le sujet dans cet article. Je vous propose une liste des 5 erreurs majeures qui vous empêchent de prendre soin de vous.
#1 Sur-compenser
La première erreur que nous faisons est de chercher des moyens (et les multiplier !) pour compenser notre frustration ou notre illusion de manquer de temps. On teste des solutions qui marchent sur d’autres personnes. L’injonction au self-care sur les réseaux sociaux est devenue tellement forte au point de nous culpabiliser si notre façon de prendre soin de nous ne coche pas les cases des pratiques instagrammables. Il y a, par exemple, cette tendance du running à laquelle je n’adhère pas, je n’ai jamais aimé courir. Cela ne m’empêche pas de prendre soin de mon corps et de ma santé mentale en pratiquant d’autres activités qui me conviennent. Une erreur sous-jacente à la sur-compensation est celle de tomber dans l’excès de toute pratique qui nous procure un bien-être. On se met à faire du sport intensif tous les jours ou à manger avec excès.
#2 Sur-consommer
Le modèle sociétal prédominant dans lequel nous vivons encourage la sur-consommation. Les virées shopping pour remplir des armoires qui débordent, les chariots de supermarché pleins, les achats compulsifs qui servent à noyer les émotions ne sont que des pansements temporaires. Avez-vous remarqué que les effets du shopping ne durent pas plus de quelques heures ? La satisfaction des achats compulsifs ou des grignotages est très rapidement remplacée par un sentiment de culpabilité.
#3 Intellectualiser
La plupart du temps, quand on ressent une baisse d’énergie ou un mal-être, on a tendance à intellectualiser ce que nous traversons en cherchant des interprétations ou des excuses. Parfois, il est important de comprendre mais il est inutile de se couper de ce qu’on ressent en se connectant aux raisons ou aux circonstances. On pense se faire du bien mais en réalité on cherche à effacer nos ressentis. Un des piliers du self-care est cette acceptation de ce que nous vivons sur le plan émotionnel sans interprétations.
#4 Négliger le corps
Je fais partie de la team » harmonie corps – esprit », je défends l’idée que prendre soin de soi commence par prendre soin du corps et observer les signaux corporels. Pour de nombreuses femmes, c’est une mission quasi-impossible car elles privilégient le soin des autres. Elles finissent par ne pas s’accorder du temps et de l’énergie pour prendre soin de leurs corps en privilégiant une alimentation saine et de l’exercice physique régulier. J’ai, pendant très longtemps, eu la fausse croyance que prendre soin de moi excluait le corps, en croyant à la force du mental.
#5 Manquer de temps
Dans cet article, je vous parlais de l’organisation du temps sur une journée et je vous expliquais ici comment le self-care nous efface cette illusion de maquer de temps. J’ai mis du temps avant de comprendre cette notion : prendre soin de soi fait gagner du temps à condition évidemment de ne pas faire les 4 erreurs précédentes. On n’est pas, ici, face à une question du type « l’oeuf ou la poule » mais bel et bien devant un choix simple : doit-on attendre d’avoir du temps pour prendre soin de soi ou doit-on prendre soin de soi pour dégager du temps ?
[…] de vie où l’on va pouvoir prendre soin de soi au quotidien. J’ai partagé, dans cet article, les erreurs à éviter pour prendre soin de soi. En tant que femmes, nous avons été éduquées […]
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